[Transcript edited for clarity]

Absent Sounds: Hi, I'm Weadee. And I'm Weajue. And you're listening to another episode of Absent Sounds on CJAM 99.1 FM, reaching higher ground in Windsor and Detroit. Each week on Absent Sounds, Weajue and I will pick two albums to play through, giving listeners interesting stories and tidbits along the way. Sometimes we are blessed to have guests join us, and the lady of the hour is Cherry herself.

Cherry Pick: Hello.

Absent Sounds: But often, because we do this in a little retrospect, we have the albums already coming out, and your EP has not yet come out. It comes out in T minus... 24 hours? Is it T minus 24?

Cherry Pick: Yeah, one day. It comes out June 2nd.

Absent Sounds: June 2nd. How are you feeling in this moment? Usually before anything, like a week in advance, my tummy will start hurting. Describe your emotional state right now.

Cherry Pick: Oh, man. Nervous, and it's pretty cliché, but nervous, excited, and wide-eyed.

Absent Sounds: Ooh. Wide-eyed and bushy-tailed.

Cherry Pick: Exactly. I'm feeling excited for it to come out, but I'm also just nervous, just 'cause it's a big thing for myself. I don't know.

Absent Sounds: The wide-eyedness of it is interesting because it's not like the first time you've put out music. What's the difference for you in releasing this EP versus releasing the stuff you've already put out before?

Cherry Pick: Yeah, for sure. This EP, I'm super hyped to put it out and I'm super proud of the songs. I'm at a point in my life where I'm not in school anymore and I'm unemployed, and the only thing I'm doing is focusing on music, as opposed to before, when it was just whatever. But because this project has taken over my life, it's a bit more of a big deal 'cause there's no plan B right now. So I guess that's why I'm a bit more nervous. But still super excited.

Absent Sounds: That's a really interesting place to be in, and also a special place, I think, because one of the press things we read that you mentioned was that it's taken you the longest amount of time, versus the other ones which you were releasing a little bit more expeditiously. Do you feel like sitting with it longer changed your writing process at all? Fundamentally, what did it change for you?

Cherry Pick: Actually, the way that I wrote and recorded this EP was pretty much the same as I did the last one, I recorded everything and then mixed it with my producer. The only part I've had to wait on is because we finished this EP completely, and then I shopped it out to labels, and then I got signed. And then I've had to wait six months after that process to actually get the songs out, because it's like a big girl release now with a label, waterfall stuff, press, and a whole bunch of, yeah, fireworks, sprinkles. But that's the part I've had to sit with, and it's been fine, but I do want out.

Absent Sounds: Does the meaning change when you sit with it for longer too? Having to wait instead of just having it be done when it's done?

Cherry Pick: No, I totally get what you mean. Everyone writes songs at a very specific time in their life, and then listening to it later, your perspective changes on a lot of things. For one song especially that isn't released, called White Fur, I originally wrote it about a vague evil man, I just needed to write something about that. But over the course of time, something happened and I slightly adjusted the lyrics to pertain to that certain situation instead. That's something that changed, just 'cause I had to sit with it.

Absent Sounds: I wanted to ask about the EP as a whole, we gotta start with the forest before we get down to the trees. Give us the overarching life that exists behind this EP.

Cherry Pick: Heard on the ground scale, this EP, there's one saying I say way too many times over this EP, and it's just "I don't wanna." I say that in almost every song. It's just a loud, quiet, distorted, messy, atonal EP, but also pretty, 'cause -

Absent Sounds: That's pretty, for all the pretty girls out there.

Cherry Pick: Yeah, exactly. Exactly.

Absent Sounds: You know what I was thinking about? I guess this is the halfway mark in the year, and when I was thinking about resolutions, a lot of times we talk about the things we do wanna do. But then I'm like, actually, I'm not gonna make a list of things I want to do, I'm gonna make a list of things I don't wanna do anymore. And it made me think, instead of the things in your life you wanna change, what are the things you don't wanna change?

Cherry Pick: That I don't wanna change? I think one of the big things right now I'm really trying to hold onto is, I don't wanna change how I feel about music, how I like to make music and how it makes me feel. And I'm struggling a little bit with that, just because of the shift in what role music plays in my life. If I'm relying on it for income, it plays a totally different role, and it's getting a little more stressful, and the stakes are getting higher. I wanna be super careful about how I treat it so I don't end up resenting it if I'm broke and I'm like, "It's 'cause of this song." But yeah, I don't wanna change how I feel about music.

Absent Sounds: That's a really precious thing to hold onto. Especially in art, that's where it always gets messy. There's always a tension, right? Needing to make money, but also not wanting to sell out. I remember this artist I really love was talking about how she can make a print that'll do well, and she knows people will buy it. And so it's like she becomes the factory to make the thing for people that they'll like or wanna buy, but it's like, I don't wanna make it anymore, so why am I doing it just to have people buy that thing? I don't know what the answer to that is either.

So jumping into the EP.

Aster

Absent Sounds: Starting with the first track, Aster. We were talking about lines earlier, and there's a line you say in this song: "I'll leave you alone if that's what you want." And it's funny because this weekend I'd said almost the same thing to someone else, and I was thinking about how I definitely felt this idea that I'm constantly the person that will have somebody else close the door, I'm not gonna do it. But if you want me to leave you alone, then tell me. Are you typically the person that struggles to close the door first, or do you relinquish that control to other people?

Cherry Pick: Honestly, I wish I was the first option, but I'm low-key a bitch, man. If I don't fuck with you, I will leave. So I think when I'm saying that line, "I'll leave you alone if that's what you want," I'm like, ugh, but yeah, I think I have too good of boundaries sometimes. If something happens, I'm like, "All right, done."

Absent Sounds: Have you gotten to a place where you've ever actually regretted walking away?

Cherry Pick: Yeah, for sure. There's so many times where I just act rash, and I don't even put in the effort to continue. I just can't be bothered. Protecting my peace a little too hard.

Absent Sounds: No, but I feel that. I only have so much energy, sometimes it's not worth it, it's too much work.

Cherry Pick: It's a fine line though, 'cause you can overdo it.

Absent Sounds: Honestly. And do you feel like you're sitting on the overdoing-it side right now?

Cherry Pick: I'm working on it. Reading some self-help books.

Absent Sounds: We love that for you. Tell us a little bit about the screaming, when do you feel like you've reached, 'cause I feel like in tracks you've gotta reach a pinnacle breaking point, where the lyrics aren't doing it anymore and you just have to let out the visceral emotion.

Cherry Pick: Yeah, for sure. I feel like that came about because we started playing the song live. In the first rendition of it, I was just whispering the whole time for that talking section. But then we started playing it live, and it's so much louder, the room is shaking, and it just, I was like, "I need to do this." 'Cause I was thinking about what the lyrics were about, and it frustrated me, 'cause that song is about a friend I, have. Have, parentheses, it's complicated. But yeah, just getting frustrated with them a little bit.

Absent Sounds: I think the tricky part about that is if you don't feel frustrated with someone, it means you kinda don't really care about the relationship sometimes.

Cherry Pick: True, actually.

Absent Sounds: I almost start to think that somebody doesn't care if they don't push back enough, if they're just constantly "okay." I find that personally, if I don't feel that invested, or if I feel pretty detached from whatever it is, when you start to notice yourself detaching from something, are there cues for you, what that looks like?

Cherry Pick: Oh man, I don't even know. I haven't done this much self-reflection in a hot minute. It just happens. The last few times it's happened, it's been pretty amicable, it feels like. I go in for friendships hard, and then something just happens, and it's just a mutual, stop talking. Which I'm happy it's worked out like that, 'cause I don't wanna -

Absent Sounds: I like agreed-upon silences rather than you block me.

Cherry Pick: Yeah, exactly. I block you in retaliation.

Absent Sounds: Wait, speaking of that, I've been trying to figure out what the best scenario is. For me, it feels like having a really dramatic falling out just feels like the most satisfying way to end things. Because the other option is letting things fade out. Where do you sit on that?

Cherry Pick: Oh man, I will avoid conflict at any cost. I do not like to have a dramatic falling out, because in those situations I literally cannot. If someone's upset at me, I kinda just shut down, and I'm just like, "I'm sorry, okay? What I did was wrong." Even if I just wanna get out.

Absent Sounds: No, I'll scroll through the paragraph and say, "Okay, I'm sorry." I didn't read anything, I just -

Cherry Pick: "TLDR, sorry that happened, and congratulations."

:3

Absent Sounds: Yes. Speaking of emotions, that also brings us to the emo-con, which we've been trying to figure out what to call it, kitty? Google said it was some kind of cat.

Cherry Pick: Nya. I don't know.

Absent Sounds: The cat, Neko Cat? I don't even remember. How do you pronounce the EP title?

Cherry Pick: Okay, I'm personally gonna call it colon three, 'cause it's just, colon three.

Absent Sounds: Or merp. I actually love that sound.

Cherry Pick: I don't really know, bro. Honestly, I just use that a lot and I thought it'd be funny. 'Cause I really dislike when bands of my genre have album names that are really long and pretentious.

Absent Sounds: Every single band.

Cherry Pick: You know what I mean? And it's like, I respect it, and some of my favorite albums have names like that, like My Mom's Dog Left Me in the Cigarette Puddle. But I just couldn't do it. I got cringed out.

Absent Sounds: So you kept it short and sweet.

Cherry Pick: We did.

Absent Sounds: We really love it, or even the playful, internet-era energy it has. The idea of having the title track be the interlude, what was your process behind that, or the thought behind it?

Cherry Pick: Y'all are gonna hate this, but honestly, there was no thought. I was just like, "I probably should put in a title track," and I was like, "I don't know, this looks cool. All right."

Absent Sounds: This is a good spot for it.

Cherry Pick: I can't even lie, as an artist, I'm not also a very emotional person. So a lot of my stuff is, I'm just doing it 'cause I'm just doing it.

Absent Sounds: Honestly, I love just doing things for the sake of doing things. I know that can get you in trouble, 'cause people are like, "Wait, what are you doing this for?" But I don't know, I didn't have a reason. I think wanting to do something is enough of a reason to do it.

Cherry Pick: Okay. Thank you. True that.

Sleep With The Fishes

Absent Sounds: Number three, Sleep With The Fishes. The concept of this track was insane, I really loved the video you had for it, and the way you conceptualized everything. Let's start from the top with the track. Tell us about Sleep With The Fishes.

Cherry Pick: Oh man, okay. This track is genuinely about the worst, most traumatic shrooms trip I've ever had. I was freshly 19, and freaking out about aging and stuff. I still live at home, and I drive by my old middle school every day. So I was just kinda like, "Whoa, this is really happening, I'm really getting older." And so I took the biggest dose of shrooms of my life with the intention to face my fear of death, and then I proceeded to puke and pass out, and it was a horrible idea. But this song is just about that, basically. It's called Sleep With The Fishes 'cause that's a saying for dying, or something.

Absent Sounds: Have you gotten over your fear?

Cherry Pick: Yes and no. I don't think anyone is not afraid of it. There might be some people who are, I don't know, because I didn't grow up religious or anything, it's always been an existential feeling when thinking about it, and I just hadn't thought about it until the past couple years. And then when I did, I was like, "I'm not ready to, I'm 19. I'm not ready to handle this."

Absent Sounds: How much time had to pass before you were able to process the really bad trip and finally write about it?

Cherry Pick: Oh God, I don't know. That song came about maybe two months after. It was fine to write about, but the last song on the EP, I wrote two weeks after the trip, and it was the worst. I was having a panic attack while writing it and crying. I was in my jam space hyperventilating 'cause I'd just switched psychedelics, don't do drugs, kids. I never had anxiety, and then after this trip I've had anxiety, but only about death. Not about life or anything. It was really scary.

Absent Sounds: You won't die. Stay safe out there.

Cherry Pick: Yo. What can I say?

White Fur II

Absent Sounds: I guess that brings us into White Fur II. While we're listening in the background, give us the picture of where we are when you're listening to it.

Cherry Pick: It's just like a dark room, and it smells like alcohol.

Absent Sounds: What's the association with white hair?

Cherry Pick: I named it White Fur just 'cause it's talking a lot about, I tried to do the whole sheep and wolf, lamb and wolf thing. And I thought White Fur was a fitting name because so many white indie musicians are assaulters and stuff.

Absent Sounds: Wolf in sheep's clothing.

Cherry Pick: Exactly. Well -

Absent Sounds: You're really good at getting really gritty with each of your records, and then pulling back, which is what just happened in our ears right now. I love that part.

Cherry Pick: Hell yeah.

Absent Sounds: Do you have a favorite canceled band?

Cherry Pick: That's a crazy question. Brand New. Oh my God, that's, okay, this song is about my ex-guitarist, who we had to kick out of the band because he sexually assaulted someone. He had a band in the Vancouver music scene that was like, everything I wanted to be, me and all my friends looked up to them so much. I thought their band was gonna make it out, and they were really good, and their songs are still bumping. They were some of my favorite songs for a while, and inspired me so much, and I've tried to write songs like it, that was just like a big brother band, and then he turned out to be exactly like every other man ever. And I was stupid to think that he wasn't.

Absent Sounds: No, you're not stupid. He was stupid.

Cherry Pick: I know, but, how many times can you learn the same lesson? The answer is a lot. A lot of times.

Absent Sounds: I'm tired of learning lessons. Are you scared or jaded to keep continuing within the music industry? 'Cause even though you've already done a lot for where you are, there's always that "I want more" or "maybe I could do more." Does that scare you a little?

Cherry Pick: I think, yes. I think I've just come to terms with the fact that as I move through the music scene and meet more people, this is just gonna keep happening again and again. It's a tale as old as time, and I can do what I can to protect myself and my friends, which is try to associate with men that I truly trust, and play with as many fem-fronted bands as I can. But it's just, the first time you learn to not trust a man is when you're a child, getting warnings from your mom, "Don't sleep over at your friend's house with a father, or -" I don't know, you know what I mean? So I think this is a lesson I'm just gonna keep learning over and over again. Especially as I get bigger, or whatever, the more encounters I have with men at my shows who are super drunk and touching my waist when they're buying merch, or talking to me while I'm backing up, and they talk to me again. I think I'm probably gonna come out with this a bit more, I was actually telling my friend Alexandra -

Absent Sounds: I love going to shows, but I was at a point where I was just like, if another drunk man steps on me or comes too close in my space, I'm gonna lose it. I was almost at my wit's end.

Knot

Absent Sounds: I guess going to the next song, talking about learning lessons or untying things, Knot. I love knots and tying, untying things. First question: how many knots do you know how to tie?

Cherry Pick: Oh man. Two? Not that many, dude. I should know more. It's like the tie-shoe one, the normal one, and then you got the other one where it's like a circle, and then you push it through the circle, and it's like a loop. Got that one. That's all I got. I'm not a fisher.

Absent Sounds: Moving from physical knots to more meta-physical, emotional knots, what's the biggest knot that you've been untying, or have already untied, in your life so far? Could be any kind of challenge that you were constantly trying to figure out.

Cherry Pick: I think the only way I can answer this is maybe the opposite, trying to make a knot bigger. This song is about my girlfriend, and how I'm the first woman she's dated after getting out of two terrible relationships with men. So I guess that's not a, what was the word I used, not a challenge, I think, an issue, not issue, but, sort of, not a challenge, 'cause relationships are challenging, and I'm just trying to make it work, and trying to be better for her.

Absent Sounds: That's a beautiful meaning, that's a lot better than it being a terrible part of your life. When you say the song is written for your girlfriend, I wanna know about the association between "knot" and love for you, what brought those two together?

Cherry Pick: Honestly, when I was writing the lyrics, it was just me talking about how I'm trying to build her trust again, not again, but she was in a relationship with a man, and I'm just letting, the lyrics are just about me being like, "Hey, girl, that looked like it really sucked. I hope I can restore some hope and humanity for you, prevent it," kinda, exactly.

Silly Putty

Absent Sounds: We're at the conclusion of the record, which is Silly Putty, such a playful title. Even though I know you probably don't overthink your titles, this one feels like, I loved how tactile that title is. It evokes so many things at once for me.

Cherry Pick: Oh, hell yeah. I actually named it that because it's a strain of shrooms. And this song is about, I imagine tripping on that, my trip, again. But I also just thought it was a funny name. I'm not trying to make the song my deepest, darkest fear. I don't know.

Absent Sounds: How intentional were you before going into, I'm sorry, you don't have to talk about this if you don't want to, I'm just curious about the process of trying to experience ego death. Do you have to be really intentional, like, "This is what's gonna happen when I go through this," or is it just, "We'll see what happens"?

Cherry Pick: Honestly, what happened to me was that as I was tripping, I was having the best time of my life. At the peak of my trip I was like, "You know what? Death is a construct, and it doesn't matter if it happens. I'm young and I feel so good. I'm gonna take a bite of this 300-milligram edible and keep these good vibes going." And I'm not really a stoner, the most I do is four milligrams at most. And so what happened is I actually greened out on shrooms, which is why I was puking and stuff. I don't even know if it was an ego death. It might have been, but it was just, I was just greening out on shrooms and thinking of death. I don't know how to explain it. It was horrible. It was horrible. It's ruled my life for the past year.

Absent Sounds: At least we got these songs. From your misery, we got some good songs, thank you for that.

Cherry Pick: You're welcome.

Absent Sounds: The song of the summer.

Cherry Pick: Yes.

Absent Sounds: I'm so excited for this beautiful collection of songs, all the stuff you've put out within the past few years has been really cool. And I'm really bummed we missed you at Departure Fest, but we'll see you at Second Summer.

Cherry Pick: Second Summer.

Absent Sounds: That's awesome. I'm super excited. Can't wait to see you at Second Summer.